Memoirs of a Lost Girl - Entry No. 7

2015.02.09 18:40:03

It has been a long time since I've had the chance to write an entry. A lot has happened – too much to think about, let alone put it into words. Many a thing that I've experienced is still strange and foreign to me, as if from a bad dream.

From what I can remember, it all began a few months ago, back when I was still in my home town. I was just returning from an errand. Something to do with a relative of mine, but my memory is very fuzzy about that. I can't even remember my own family now. Though, I'm not sure if that's quite right. I'm not sure if I've truly forgotten, trying to recall something of my past causes headaches. Hopefully that will cede over time.

I do distinctly and rather unnaturally clearly remember this though: I strolled along a road and was distracted by a strange feeling of unease. Something seemed off and it made me stop. As I looked to my right, down a grassy slope towards a wide riverbed, I saw it for the first time: A fissure.

I don't know how to quite form it into words, as I still struggle to comprehend what it even is supposed to be. Try to imagine a crack, a hole floating about in the air. But it goes inwards in all directions. No matter how you try to approach it or look at it, it always bends inwards. You can't see where it's going, light seems to get sucked into it and the only thing escaping it is a dim, purple glow.

My instincts told me to turn away and run, quick to forget it, but my body would not oblige. I turned around, stepped off the street and down the slope, closer towards the enigma. My mind felt blank at the time, I didn't really think of anything. I stopped at about a meter before it and examined it slowly. But no matter how much I tried to look, I could not see an end.

With considerable effort I managed to concentrate hard enough to think. I sat down and tried to reason what to do next, whether I should touch it, or try to run away.

For a long while I sat there, considering the choice that should not be. As I stared on into the violet fissure of the world, it seemed to pull me closer. It drew my eyes in and drained them of their vision, claiming it for itself. Before I realised it, I was surrounded by purple and I was no more.

I don't know exactly what happened next. I must have fallen unconscious for a long time, as I was engulfed in absolute darkness when I awoke. I was aching all over, and I could feel my clothes being torn in various places. Around me I sensed lots of small branches, leaves and sticks, but I also noticed the presence of other things, things that struck me with fear. I tried to shout for help, but the words were stuck in my throat, I was too scared. Cautiously I tried to get up, making sure not to cause any noise. But as I put weight onto my right ankle I collapsed again, pain soaring up my leg and filling my mind. My heart began pounding harder and harder until it was all I could hear.

When I awoke next, I was laying on a rocky riverbed and cool air was washing over me. I could still feel my swollen ankle and the various bruises. I sat upright and opened my eyes. Presented to me was a washed out world of black and white; all colour had faded from it, leaving only contrast behind. Large, snowy mountains and steep cliffs surrounded me, the air felt very light and clear.

Suffice to say that I was left very confused. I didn't know what to make of any of this, nor could I think too hard about it in the first place as a tremendous, pulsating pain on my forehead diminished all constructive thought. I tried getting up again. This time I could at least hobble for a few steps despite my swollen ankle. I don't remember what I did next, I must have wandered around aimlessly for quite a while and fallen unconscious again at some point.

The next few days exist only as bizarre fever dreams in my memory; strange warped creatures surrounding me, colours fading and washing over, buildings bending and stretching in contrived manners. Here and there I could make out people talking in a language foreign to me, their words being woven into the dreams. I felt very hot all the time, plagued by fever and the constant headache. The first time I awoke kicking and screaming. With my eyes ripped wide open I could make out a small, dim cabin. A bucket of water lay kicked over next to me, my clothes were drenched in sweat. With a loud bang the door in front of me sprung open, a large figure rushing through it. I lost consciousness again.

Over what felt like half an eternity, my dreams gradually calmed down. The fever vanished and the pain on my forehead receded. There is no doubt in my mind that this illness as well as my random displacements must have been caused by my encounter with the fissure. I can only imagine that it might take whomever touches it to a random location. Considering this I must have been very lucky to get away with some bruises and a jolted ankle. However, I can't quite explain why I shifted locations multiple times. The fissure must have reappeared at certain times, but I have no clue why or how it would.

As I would gradually learn, I had been taken in by a very good-natured couple that found me laying on a mountain path. They had decided to take me in and treat me. Apparently I had been struck by heavy fevers for almost two months. I'm now trying to compensate them by helping around their small house, but it is quite difficult as I can't speak their language and I'm only picking it up rather slowly. I hope they let me stay until I can figure out where to go next from here, as I still have no idea where I really am, let alone how to get back.

Back… If only I could remember where that was.

Written by shinmera